


Skeleton

by lizardboyo



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Autistic Christine Canigula, Cute, Driving, F/F, Fluff, Polyamory, Trans Brooke Lohst, the front bottoms :3c, uh chloe is Bad :3c
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2019-02-14 17:42:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13012878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lizardboyo/pseuds/lizardboyo
Summary: Christine and Brooke are awake, Jenna's sleeping in the backseat. It's a long drive.





	Skeleton

Fuck Chloe.

  
The two words echoed around in her head. These days it seems like those are the only words she can seem to think about. It's more a matter of convincing herself than it is truly believing herself, or believing Christine or Jenna. Christine doesn't say it with the same kind of anger that Jenna does, but she says it with more passion. More compassion, rather. She's the only one who Brooke really opens up to anymore. She's the only one who's awake, and the only one who's sober. She knows better than to smoke while driving.

  
Brooke's glad she's asleep in the passenger seat because she can't focus when she's awake. She can't focus when she's this high. She can't focus when she has to focus on anything other than Chloe because Chloe was such a big part of her life for five damn years. Chloe's the only thing Brooke let herself think about because everything else hurt to think about. Chloe's the only thing that hurts to think about now.   
Masochist.

  
*

  
That time Chloe kissed Brooke out of complete impulse and Brooke didn't know how to not kiss back. So she kissed back. And she kissed back every time.

  
— _I walked around like a skeleton last night_  
 _Trying to find my way home_  
 _This white frame it’s all that I’ve got left_ — 

Chloe stands in front of an open window and struggles to close it. Brooke doesn't want to get in the way so she doesn't move. She can't move. 

— _Cause not even you could chew through my bones_   
_I’ve got very strong bones_ — 

She can't move. She's trapped in a box, a box the size of her body and her skin and it's not a box it's just her body and her skin surrounding her and she's suffocating. She can't breathe. 

— _I walked around like a skeleton last night_   
_Confused and alone_   
_Who was I kidding I can’t get past you,_   
_You are the cops, you are my student loans_ — 

*

Brooke looks up and sees the red light and the red brake lights of the red car in front of her and the red clouding her vision. She's seeing red even though she can breathe again. She's awake and she's looking at Christine. 

— _You are a head shaped hole_   
_In a sheet rock wall_   
_You are the pain I feel_   
_You are the stud in the wall_   
Better than nothing at all— 

"Didn't mean to wake you up, I had to brake faster than I thought I'd need to," Christine exhales heavily and keeps her eyes locked on the car ahead of her.

— _And I got so stoned_   
_I fell asleep in the front seat_   
_I never sleep in the front seat_   
I’m too tall— 

"It's okay," Brooke looks over her shoulder to see Jenna asleep in the backseat, "Bad dream anyway."

— _And I got so stoned_   
_I fell asleep in the front seat_   
_I never sleep in the front seat_   
I’m too tall— 

Christine nods and moves her hand from hovering over the parking brake to toying with Brooke's cardigan. Brooke can't imagine anyone else's hand in her place. Christine's the only girl who knows just what Brooke needs to hear or see or feel. She's the only person in the world who does.

— _Come on, baby, calm me down_   
_You’re the only one who knows how_ — 

Brooke's singing along quietly and she knows that Christine knows that she's singing the words for her to hear. It's the time of year where Brooke doesn't have time to sing lyrics she doesn't mean. Old habit; superstition, maybe. If she's wearing her yellow cardigan she's only singing lyrics she can associate with people in her life. She's been singing for about three years, and no one has questioned it. 

Christine knows, of course. Brooke couldn't come up with an excuse when Christine asked to try the cardigan on. Brooke didn't mind though, she'd never seen someone so radiant. She still doesn't mind.

She leans over the center console to lay on Christine's shoulder. She's too tall when she's sitting right next to Christine, but the space between the two is just enough. Christine continues looking ahead, but softly rests her head on Brooke's. Brooke looks up to see the blue light of the dashboard illuminate Christine's facial features. She looks back at the dashboard and sees it's nearing three in the morning. She closes her eyes. 

— _I fell asleep in the front seat_   
_I never sleep in the front seat_   
_I’m too tall_   
_But I got so stoned._ — 

The song is over and Brooke doesn't feel obligated to stay awake any longer. She feels safe. She's asleep again. She hasn't been able to sleep with others surrounding her for too long. She's safe now.

**Author's Note:**

> dont @ me chloe sucks folks and uh brooke deserves better dont brink pinkberry near me (a hundred knife emojis here)
> 
> the song that plays is skeleton by the front bottoms


End file.
